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Wednesday, November 30, 2011

Yakkity yak

Well, as sure you have noticed I have pretty much completely lost my motivation to run. Since February I have gained 14 lbs. FOURTEEN! Im almost back to where I was when this journey began almost two years ago. I feel worse than I felt even at my heaviest and it is weighing heavily on my heart and soul. The good news is that I think I have snapped out of it. I ran twice last week, both around 2 miles. Starting up slowly so that I don't hurt myself, kind of trying to ease my way into it.

It is so strange. You are losing weight and doing great and it is so motivating that you can't help but be totally on track. And then something happens. Maybe it's a weekend out of town or injury or illness, but something happens to throw you off kilter. And you feel discouraged and unmotivated. And then you start gaining weight and you become less and less motivated to move or eat right or anything. Why is that?

Whatever the reason, I'm so over it. I'm done with squeezing into my jeans that I just bought six months ago. I'm done with feeling completely self-conscious with everything I wear. Im ready to move forward and get back on track.